As I write this it is the end of October, which marks the beginning of my last month in Sabah. I am sitting here wondering what to write, as it feels like life has slowed down considerably. I cannot help but reflect on where I was when I first started in June. I was nervous to be here, I was in shock and denial that I had actually uprooted my life. My new reality for the next six months was going to be spent in Malaysia, far away from my support system and comforts. It has not been an entirely easy six months – I think everything that I was scared of happening did. I have had my passport damaged, my credit card hacked, my laptop shut down, and I have gotten severely sick with the stomach flu. I have undergone personal growth and major changes in every aspect of my life and I can say that every cell of my being has experienced discomfort. Nothing has stayed the same but I have grown and revealed to myself how resilient and strong I am. I have shown myself that moving all the way across the world without really knowing where you are going is possible.
I knew this internship would challenge me yet I took it upon myself anyways. And because of that I have had experiences and opportunities that I wouldn’t have otherwise. I have mixed feelings about leaving, part of me is homesick and can’t wait to be surrounded by the comforts of home. But another part dreads the end and having to say goodbye to everyone at the office, all the animals, and my fellow intern Marcus.
At the end of September I was fortunate enough to attend Helen Lasimbang’s marriage blessing. I had the opportunity to dress up in traditional Kadazan clothing and feel like part of the family. There was a huge celebration at PACOS with lots of food and I may or may not have been forced to try buffalo brain (actually not bad). From mid morning to late at night everyone danced, drank, and ate and I got to experience what it was really like to be apart of Kadazan (and Malaysian) community and culture. It was so much fun to be a part of it and I even caught the bouquet. It gave me further insight into how collective society is here, friends and family kept showing up throughout the day to just gather and connect and have a good time. Before the wedding, there were days of preparation and cleaning. Helen’s sisters, Anne, Rita, and Maria spent a large majority of their time preparing and helping Helen. I quickly realized how accustomed I have become to being apart of a collective, everyone is intertwined and always around. It will be a big adjustment once I am back home, as Western society is more individualistic.
Right after the wedding Marcus and I went to the horse races with his work colleague, Richard. To be honest I was more interested in petting the horses than the actual races, which I did get to do! Afterwards, we went to a restaurant and hung out with some of the locals who worked at the track and sang karaoke until way too late. In the middle of October I did a visa run to Bangkok. I got to meet up with fellow interns Carly and Maya – where we went to the ancient city temple museum and biked 10K. Before coming back to Borneo, I had a very short 24 hour stop in Kuala Lumpur. It was interesting for me to go, as I had always heard that Kota Kinabalu was much different from peninsular Malaysia and I was eager to see the differences for myself.
I can’t believe this is my last blog post in country. It is hard to wrap my head around the fact that pretty soon this won’t be my reality anymore. There has been so much surrounding this internship, it is going to be hard to let it go. However, I know that I have learned so much and that it is ingrained in me and always will be.
